yooooo

well this internet is slow like no other, kinda like that turle who sits in my living room, made of clay, going no where. but i've got some time right now so its all good. were in cambodia, i've only taken a pic here and there but theres this guy whering a shirt saying shanti (peace)! holla. well i've been doing a lot of thinking, almost too much thinking I couldn't sleep for hours. I wrote a big ol list in my journal of what I want to do in my time coming. I think I may suprise my mom at her shop, on my birthday, and copy james and celebrate two of them! hahah thats fine cause when its my birthday, I say its my birthday for like a week hahah, max knows what im talking about. anyways i'gotta make da monet to get degas to make the vangoh theres a joke to that but i just killed it with the punch line. yeahh so paying the pills, and buying the stuff I want, like james lap top, frensh presses and coffee grinders, i'm going to import colombian beans thru my friend juan and this isnt a metaphor for antying hahah. well I think i'm taking care of myself, drinking milk and keeping the beer for a special occasion, like kicking back the day on the beach with a drink, its very good, but it has its moments. umm so i've been interested in this photography stuff and I'm looking at pictures of hannahs bro and my friend matt, they talk of a thing called a light room...hmmmm interesting. anyways I need to learn to build a woodfire kiln, i'm going to get a wheel hopefully soon after I can earn it and then throw and keep at a bone dry state, collect and make peices that are perfect, and then I can build my kiln and fire with like 6 of my friends, its a night and day type of thing and gotta maintain like a temp of 18oo crajee huh? a load of wood would be needed and as far as how natural and earthy ceramics is, it does a deed on the environment. hmmm so my major, raising environmental awareness through mixed media, hahah we'll see if that flys, through cinema, writing, and ecology lets say. I'm not sure yet. I' actually found a love for writing thanks to bloggin and journaling, its like that pensieve where I can deposit my thoughts and come back to it later hahaha n.e.r.d. holla. well okay so we spent time on that island, it was good, but didn't get much of a thai experience, but I did pick up leafy local rolling papers, (I gotta quit you) moms gonna kill me, actually prolly my sis ahahh. anyways I'm going to continue ultite when I get back, yo jeremy put me on spring roster, lets go to regions! hahah but my number is oging to be taken by some fool, thats all gs i've still got my jersey, first of a kind for M.U.D minnesota ugly duckling bitches! haha like you care. okay so email is taking forever to pop up wtf. i've got long pants and al ight sweatershirt on, what am I doing its like sunny and warm out... but I need something to drape over my bag so it doesnt get yoinked while I'm walking on the street, if my camera was taken i'd lose it all. so we were on the bus this is freaking me out but I think if i express myself it shouldnt haunt me, and these french bitches, literally came and sat in front of me and this dude from finland and just leaned the fuck back, and crushed his leg against the side wall and pushed his knees far into my half of the seat. I asked politely and she wouldn't budge. then I had a rage of thoughts, of things I wish I was capable of doing, hitting her seat like a child, pouring water on her, making her ride miserable i soooo wished I could be soo mean but you know I cant. anyways things are working out anyways and were having a good time. lots of thanks to higher peoples and peoples looking out, I hope to see you all very soon, someday again to say the least. i wish I had pictures, but jake better be in that black room or i'll have a fit, what else is he using my camera for? I hope hes having a good time, taking pics and meeting friends. I'll probably end up saying bye to him and like Ill see you back home. looking into the future is too hard on my mind, its troublesome the endless options I can have and i'm grateful for that, but its overwhelming. still with this email wtf! anyways i've started to budge, stay around 16 dollars a day and I should be able to make it to china and back home to korea. it should be good. still with this internet i'm going to go crazy. ohhh if I go home i've got my guita, nice. maybe i'll pick up my friends mandolin and give that a shot, everybody plays guitar. hannah lost her cards, shes going to deposit into my account, kinda sketchy right? we've been huslted a few times, its frustrating but were getting better at avoiding thepeople. they itnercept you the second you step off the bus and take you to places making us think were getting a service. wrong, we got a terrible exchange rate from the place this man took us. note ignore these people, walk away and just try and find it on your own, you'll find another taxi, another bank, a legit bus station where you will be able to buy your tickets. they try and tell you there arent buses running, trains boats, but their lying, go to the pier and buy that night ticket. what tricksy people. okay so I've got a half bar on my email opening up, how troublesome. anyways its a wonderful day and were about to see some anciet ruins of anchor wat, i'm going to make little picture cards and give you guys some. copy the hongdae art fairs to some extent with my own little touch. woow this just goes on and on well we'll be here for a few more days so I'm sure I can get another update...if I feel like it. I guess i have the rest of my life to become good at the things I do, I don't have to be an amazing artist now, I don't have to be the best shredder, I don't have to take breathaking photos, but If I keep trying I will find my own, and once the self apears then I will know i'm the best. can you relate? once your so sure of who you are, nobody can bring you down, if you build on a good foundation of love, friendship and happiness, (can't be happy all the time but its the ups and downs thatmake life soo sweet) anyways I miss that kid, in chicago doing a buck 80 and his moto. but guess maybe i'm going home early so it wont be so long till I see him. I guess I'm still a kid, but i'm on my quest for maturity, and I hope someday I can feel of age where I'm responsible, take care of my lifea nd the people around me, and be mature in the way I interact in the world. But I guess me is me and i'm a kid to some point, still like running around, losing hannah and pat and worrying them to death, sorry dudes. but I interact so well with older people, I guess i'm just good for people or something something "good for everyone" anyways I always wished I had an odler bro, so maybe thats why I look up to people older than me, I wish I was closer withmy sister, but maybe when I'm back home and can age up a little bit and be chill with her and josh, there gonna get married soon, I don't want to be in the wedding but I want to rock out so fucking hard at the reception! I hope i have a crazy dance partner tho hahaha. dancing is like sex, so get better hhahaha I think gelly and james read that one. I don't really know but theres a lot of passion in dancing, and I can further express my dance through swingns and twists and steps that would be awesomeeeee I still want to get lost in the jungle, hopefully not in cambodia due to a large quantity of land minds, would you guys still love me without a leg or arm?? creappyyy fuckkkkkkkkkkkk thats messed up. hahaha sorry. i'm wearing headphones but theres no music ahhaha lame. hahahah i cant belive you guys like reading this ahahha. this is long too, my friends have told me once they've read this whole thing, is that like in one go? theres pages and pages and hours of writing in this thing, funny. shit what am I still doing here, get out foo! peace