parts of me just want to snowboard everyday in the winter, and play ultimate frisbee the rest of the seasons. Wasting my life before Gods hands should be an honorable thing. I'm put in places where I love people who usually arent, I feed people who usually don't eat, heal people without medicine, and make people laugh when everything inside is hurting. I need another transformation of my mind.
to let loose or not to let loose...
Is there a reason why i'm not indulging in the pleasures of the world? Getting drunk, pimping girls, getting high. Is there a reason why my lifestyle, makes me a black sheep within the college community? Is there a reason why i'm in part of a church body when I could be throwing discs and having fun that way?
Theres a reason why he said to me, "i am the way, the truth and the life." One way, to know a person (truth is not a thing, its a person), to know why I live my life (or have a life to live).
Then why am I hungering after the things of the world that made me so empty and left me so depressed? Do I really have what it takes to make a difference?
Don't give up Peter man.
heres a poem I wrote. Written in the subway after i'd been walking in gangnam, seeing post its for hookers.
Mad bad mad sad,
Debauchery clad
Not very glad
Drunken dad
Maybe his lad
A buck or two
For a sec or two
Pictured ads
Desperate hads
Careless hands
Slurry demands
Mad bad mad sad,
Sobreity,
Inevitable
Regret
Sadly Inevitable
Running mad
Isn't it sad.
can I disturb you a bit now? because this is what I wrote in bed.
Prostitution; murders, commits adultry, steals, lies, is glutony, is idolatry, is self worship, devalues human life, is slavery.
A quote from the documentary Furious Love
'I want to die. Being dead and in he'll would be better than this'
Pimps and club rats don't hear this from their sex slaves. They hear what they pay for, a shallow comment to make you think your loved, when the reason your seeking a moments sexual pleasure is because in some place in your life, you felt like you weren't.
Your never alone, your never forsaken. There is always one; crying over you, smiling over you, singing over you, being proud of you, cheering for you, and loving you no matter what. Go head and find Him, I like to call Him love, but you can call him dad, friend, brother or father, you can call him Yahweh, or Emmanuel, or Jehova - shalom, nissi, jireh, raphi. Or simply Jesus.
How are you? Is all it takes to speak into a broken heart.
how weak I am,
i'm scared of the darkness,
but I gotta be light.
(don't sugar quote these topics, stand up for someone who is hurting)
2 comments:
hey peter it's eunice lee from new philly!
this entry was really intriguing and i really enjoyed reading it.
i especially loved your poem!
p.s. you CAN make a difference in this world. (but you already know that) :]
real stuff peter.
don't be scared of the darkness or depression. God's pulled you out of all that so you can shine. so shine brother :)
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